Uh. . . I wrote this in January and never posted it. Some friends and I had a conversation about the KKC this weekend and realized I never posted it, so here it is.
So, I ran it. We (Mandy and I) got there and it was chilly but not too bad. We prepared for the race in my new office in Daniels, and headed to the Bell Tower, where there were OH MY GOD a lot of people. Almost immediately an announcement came that we were to go stand in the street and await the start.
There were all kinds of people there: young, old, high school groups, civic groups, runners under 10 years old, babies in strollers, dogs along for the run. Some really imaginative props too: a guy dressed as Elvis, a guy with a mullet wig, a guy with a shirt with the “DO NOT ENTER” streetsign logo altered to say “DONUT EATER”, a guy with an Andy Vanderveer jersey and Spiderman mask (he was big enough to have actually been Andy Vanderveer too), and a guy wearing a bizarre costume that made it look like he was riding an ostrich.
Off we went, and the going was real easy. Hillsborough St is a gradual downhill. I had some trouble getting my iPod to start correctly, but within a couple hundred yards I had 2Pac “Hit ‘Em Up” playing and I kicked into gear.
Somehow, I kept going around corners at the same time as the ROTC, and ended up sprinting past them on the outside.
I eventually got to the KK and was immediately almost jacked up by some clueless woman on a bike. Only a Barry Sanders maneuver saved me. Around the back we went, and then I saw the tons of people. I made my way to a table and picked up a box.
I saw what those around me were doing, and the more serious they were about this thing, the more upset they looked. Some were using the Kobayashi method of squishing donuts and dipping them in water. Their hands were dripping with glaze and water. Others were compacting the donuts like a stack of CDs, 4-6 crammed flat, making the densest donut ever. They were chewing with their mouths open, not particularly quickly, but deliberately and unhappily.
You know I am not usually a big donut eater, but I knew what I was in for. I had been telling everyone I would eat “a couple” and everyone made fun of me. So I opened the box, and it was clear that the hot light had definitely been on earlier that morning. That first donut was awesome. So very delicious. I made quick work of it.
I ate two more. I was not going quickly, but felt good that I had already eaten more than “a couple.”
I looked for water, found it, and ate a fourth. Opened the box again, looked inside, said to myself “how have I only eaten 4?”
I ate a fifth and stopped liking donuts.
I ate a sixth and That’ll Do, Pig, That’ll Do.
Off I ran. I was slightly worried that the donuts would reappear, as many folks had that problem, but I felt fine.
I ran like a freaking gazelle. I felt great. It felt like the whole return trip was downhill. I even sprinted the last 1/3 mile or so, but I was just pushing myself regardless of whom I passed. I doubt anyone took offense. I finished at a 5:13 mile pace, which I can only say is about the fastest I can possibly sprint. Overall, I ran at about a 7:40 pace (not including donut-eating time), which ain’t bad. I guess that when one usually runs at hilly-ass Lake Johnson, normal city streets are no problem.
Overall, I think I could have done the full dozen. I could have kept them down, I think, but the real challenge would have been getting them all in me. It wasn’t easy getting 6 down my gullet.
There’s always next year.
Tags: General Thoughts by Tony
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