Tony’s Journal

So last night at Chez Target, I am looking through the clearance picture frames, and I hear a young couple on the next aisle over.

Girl: You are so sweet! You are too sweet!
Guy: Heh heh.

Then they come a-walking around the corner on to my aisle, and I am curious to find out what this sweet guy looks like so that I may emulate him. But, being courteous as I am, I wait for a discreet glance. They are playing around and looking at picture frames behind me. Then the guy says “Hey man.” I ignore him, even though it is evident that I am the only man there besides him. He tries again.

Guy: Excuse me, sir?
Me: (turns around and looks up) Yeah?
Guy: (with arms wrapped around girl) She wants to marry me.
Me: (thought bubble: “whoa, that’s Scooter Sherrill!”) Oh really? Ha ha, well, that’s good.
Girl: (giggles)
Me: You know, you can register here for your wedding gifts.
Scooter: Ha, I’ll keep that in mind. (smiles: bling bling)

And that was it. I should have offered to buy them a wedding present, even though I don’t know if he was serious or not. It was clear that she was his girlfriend, though.

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Ellen’s van got stolen last night. Sucks for her. Oh well, it was just an old Ford Aerostar, could be worse I suppose.

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IBM is not being very good to us. They know the specs we want. and we want a low price on their high-end laptop, and we know they can give it to us. So what do they do? Give us a really low price for a machine that has lower specs than what we asked for. Thanks, guys, that really helps.

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And lastly, a pleasant surprise. We now have six times the amount of smallpox vaccine we thought we had. Although I wonder how a large company can “forget” they had 70-90 million doses stocked up.

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Stupid pollen. I am combating you with my Maximum Strength Tylenol Sinus Non-Drowsy.

Well, I just ordered myself an ankle brace for use during basketball and other excersice. It should reduce the chances of my foot snapping off during play, which are alarmingly high due to my history of spraining my left ankle time after time.

Also cancelled my Chasing Amy DVD that I had ordered at amazon. I just don’t really want it that much anymore.

Yesterday I mentioned Dudley Moore for the first time in my life, I think, and it looks like it killed him.

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Damn all this pollen! Out of the tree, into the air, into my lungs. I’m praying that no bees fly into my lungs and try to gather pollen from my alveoli.

So Denzel Washington was on television last night on some show. He was dressed well, and was thanking lots and lots of people for chipping in to buy him what appeared to be a miniature C3PO doll. Guess he’s a big fan. I would think that a bunch of high rollers could get him something a little nicer.

Just like him, I am breathlessly awaiting the release of the new Star Wars film “Episode II: Lucas Wants More Money.” All summer long we will hear about nothing but this movie, and see the stupid products it spawns. As you know, as Americans, we must demand more Darth Vader Dixie Cups, more Luke Skywalker hair dryers, and more horrifying lollipops that require decent people like you and me to shamefully deep-tongue an alien being just to get to the candy deep inside, or the terrorists will have already won.

Weekend Recap: Twas a restful weekend.

Saturday: Woke up, went to Bojangles. THAT is the way to start a weekend, friends. Then went and played basketball with the droogies, Billy beat Chris and I in two games of 21. That bastard tipped me when I had 13 and the lead in the first game. Went to O’Charley’s for dinner, and the waiter called us all “Boss,” which was nice. He then proceeded to screw up 3 of the 4 tickets, but no big deal. Went to watch Ocean’s Eleven at Witherspoon, which was curiously crowded. I thoroughly enjoyed the film. I’ll be buying it when it is released on DVD, I think.

Sunday: Went to the new mall in Durham with Cynthia and her mom. It was large. Nicely laid out, and featured many cool stores. They have an Apple store, which almost interested me, but not quite. There is a Fossil store, and I saw that the watch I want still has not come down in price one penny. Brought my Chick-Fil-A coupon to eat lunch at the food court, but of course Chick-Fil-A is closed Sundays. Ate at California Pizza Kitchen, who make a tasty pizza — I had not eaten at a CPK since high school. I didn’t see anything purchase-worthy at the mall until the very end; bought 2 shirts at Hecht’s. Helped Cynthia bake a pie, and most of that help was of the “eating” variety.

Back to work. Maybe I can get the access point working, and we can work outside.

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I had a hell of a day at work today. In a bad way. Spent 6 hours on repairing one computer, and it’s not even done yet. Didn’t get to go to the gym (Cynthia needed me, and she is far more important than any exercise), but was able to go to Bojangles. Tomorrow: Gym, for real.

God Bless America, and God Bless TV Commercials. It never made sense to me how the Trix rabbit was so wired all the damn time even though he was never able to get that cereal. Well, I have found the original Trix commercial, and sure enough, in the beginning, he was just whiny and sad, in that annoying “I’m going to loudly lament the fact that I don’t have [something], and of course I shall make sure to do so in your presence, in hopes that you will take pity on me and share with me that which I so desire.” Well, these kids would have none of it, not even in the beginning, and ignored the rabbit who was stricken with perverted cereal lust, all the while praising the fruitiest of morning grub so as to rub in the interspecial discrepancy in Trix wealth.

This commercial teaches the following:

1. If your friend is depressed, ignore them.
2. Do not share! For the love of God and all that’s holy!
3. Trix are for kids.

That’s edu-adver-tainment!

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They don’t call him Smoove B for nothin, you know.

Once I possess the piece of chocolate, I will carry it back to your apartment on foot, not stopping even when my leg muscles scream in indescribable pain. On and on will I walk until I have brought this magnificent morsel of candy to your bedside. I will then put it inside the mouth of my queen using a pair of specially constructed solid-gold chocolate-feeding tongs.

That other woman? You must believe me when I say that I would not walk down to the Mobil station to get her a Clark bar.

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Ah yes, back in the friendly confines of 215 Page Hall.

Through the miracle of modern science, the lunch I brought was much more voluminous than normal, yet was still quite healthful and filling. I was astounded to find that I gained no weight over vacation. I also walked about 4 1/2 miles I guess this weekend, between Lake Johnson with Justin and Jim, and Hemlock Bluffs with Cynthia. Nevertheless, I will be getting back to the gym after work today. I bet it will be crowded with a lot of people who spent last week saying “I can’t believe I ate the whole thing.”

I have a headache. I think I might head for the gym a little early today.

You know what I saw today on the way to work? The front door of the old theater was open! Unusual, but not unheard of. But the second door was open too, and I could see all the way to the back! The place looks cool, but does need tons of work done on it.

I didn’t do anything Irish at all yesterday. Wore no green, ate no corned beef nor cabbage. (Had some fries, does that count as potatoes?) Drank no Harp, no Guinness (I can’t believe that, I even have a Guinness in the fridge.). Didn’t get drunk and lay in the gutter, didn’t commit acts of hooliganism. Didn’t eat any Lucky Charms, found no pot o’ gold. Didn’t make this many offensive stereotypes yesterday either, now that I think about it.

I think I may postpone my new computer for a bit. Rent time is coming up. I need to pay the rent. So I said to myself, I said “Look MANNNN,” I said “You can wait a while.” I tell Mandy I got a job, I’m gonna pay the rent. She said “Yeah?” I said “Oh yeah.”

And then she was so nice. Lawd, she was lovey-dovey.

Okay, actually, I have enough money, but I’m gonna wait anyhow.

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Spring Broken was lots of fun. I didn’t want it to end at all. . . I’ll talk about that sometime later.

Today has been. . . wack. I dunno, it is such a weird day, what with work, basketball, and other stuff. . . all this @#%. . . “ERROR: DOES NOT COMPUTE.”

Billy and Mandy will be back tomorrow, that should make some difference, should restore some normalcy.

(This could all be the cider talking, but I don’t think it is, really.)

Went to Bojangles with Justin and Jim — it was good to get back home. Thence to Lake Johnson for a brisk walk of 2.5 miles. I feel good about that.

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Time to make the donuts go to Florida!

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The ankle, she is getting better, but still I gimp around. It’s real easy to do. Check it out:

First I limp to the side like my legs was broken
Shakin’ and twitchin’ kinda like I was smokin’
Crazy, wack, funky
People say “You look like MC Hammer on crack, Humpty!”

I am finishing up the pricing pages and some other things, then I will have the next three days to clean things up before vacation. Kathy and Aaron will be out the rest of the week — oh that reminds me! Aaron’s wife had a baby this morning! A little girl! I don’t know the details, but mother and daughter are doing fine.

I feel like I’m writing a church newsletter.

Anyhow, I meant to say that Kathy and Aaron will be out the rest of the week. Aaron has been out since yesterday, and Kathy is here today, but won’t be the rest of the week. I told Kathy “maybe I’ll leave early on Friday then to watch the basketball games,” and she said “yeah, go home, around here everyone knows that nothing gets done on ACC friday.” Awesome. This job is great. So I guess I’ll leave at noon on Friday.

Yesterday I went by and checked out the case that a guy on the Wolf Web is selling. It’s an Antec 1030b, just like I wanted, with a 330W PSU and and extra fan. (That’s a total of 4 case fans — I put in a processor fan and the little video card fan and my computer will sound like a jet engine.) He’s willing to sell it for $60, which is a hell of a bargain considering it’d be at least $100 new and it’s onl;y 4 months old. So I’ll be getting that after break, and then I’ll order all my new components. An Athlon XP 1700+, 512MB RAM, 40GB or 60GB HDD, MSI K7T266 Pro2 motherboard (no USB 2.0 or IDE RAID controller, I don’t need that), and a Thermalright SK-6 heatsink/fan. 1337.

Note to the Spring Broken: I bought my Busch Gardens ticket online today; it comes out to $48.10 including tax. There’s no shipping because you pay online and print out your own ticket. You don’t have to say which day you’re going to show up though, which is nice, because if we change palns and don’t go Tuesday, it won’t matter. Mmmm. . . Tuesday. A week from today. Mmmm. . . Florida.

And to all the ladies, peace and humptiness forever.

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Holy crap! Cosby show marathon on Nickelodeon — now!

I know what I’m watching on my way to sleep now.

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